People will be quick to make a comment on whether a person owns a mirror or not, based on how they are dressed. Or comments will be passed such as, "Take a moment to look in the mirror before you leave your house!" I can tell you as a mother of 2 small kids there are plenty of mornings I do not have that moment to lend to a glance in the mirror. Or if I do get a moment, I will more than likely forget what I was about to do anyway. So to avoid those days of lingering stares or or awkward glances, I tried to abide by a few rules that everyone should put into their daily routines as well...
1) If your pants can be described as a "mustardy color" they should be avoided, this color is not flattering to nearly every figure that exists on this planet.
2) There should never be an article of clothing that can have a lace-y mesh type of finish to it.
3) Camel toe is not just a visual thing, it's a feeling as well. If the feeling is there, there is also a visual. Spare everyone that sight.
4) Putting on something at the age of thirty something should not remind you of a piece of clothing you had when you were in high school, there is such a thing as age appropriate.
5) Being in the work place needs to take you to a new level.
6) Know the correct size of your undergarments. Stacey & Clinton are not wrong when they say this can change your world.
7) Animal print is tricky and should always require several looks in the mirror, allow yourself that extra time.
8) Go out and get yourself some dress socks. Seeing someone with a pair of dress shoes and white athletic socks is never a good thing.
9) Sunglasses are for when it is bright out.
10) Less is more when you're talking about accessories, make up, hair. If you try to apply this theory to clothing, more is almost always more.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Life's Lessons Learned From Antiques Roadshow
I love Antiques Roadshow, I think you can learn a lot from it. People don't realize you can take away so much from a show like this....
Just because it's old, doesn't mean it's worthless, most things get better with age
For my single friends, don't be afraid to go dumpster diving in other people's trash. Some toss items away not realizing what a great thing they had. Translate that into your love life!
If something (someone) has been refurbished, it may look pretty, but really it was great just as it was
Don't feel like things always have to be shiny and new looking. Aging gives it character and a whole new beauty.
Things that are fake, are just that, fake, leave 'em be, they're not worth your time and/or money
Putting more money, or love, into something that already has value, can only make it more valuable.
There is a market out there for everything and everyone, you just need to find that market
Keeping it in the family, well that only really works for some things, others should never be kept in the family, that's just gross.
For all of you out there who don't watch this fantastic show, look at what you're missing. It's not just old stamp collections and dusty lamps, it's a whole new way of life. Embrace it.
Just because it's old, doesn't mean it's worthless, most things get better with age
For my single friends, don't be afraid to go dumpster diving in other people's trash. Some toss items away not realizing what a great thing they had. Translate that into your love life!
If something (someone) has been refurbished, it may look pretty, but really it was great just as it was
Don't feel like things always have to be shiny and new looking. Aging gives it character and a whole new beauty.
Things that are fake, are just that, fake, leave 'em be, they're not worth your time and/or money
Putting more money, or love, into something that already has value, can only make it more valuable.
There is a market out there for everything and everyone, you just need to find that market
Keeping it in the family, well that only really works for some things, others should never be kept in the family, that's just gross.
For all of you out there who don't watch this fantastic show, look at what you're missing. It's not just old stamp collections and dusty lamps, it's a whole new way of life. Embrace it.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Open Window Weather
Tis the season!! The evenings when you go to bed with the windows open and fall asleep to the cool breezes coming through! Fantastic!
Not so fantastic, open window weather and your 5 year old throws a tantrum larger than the grand canyon! I am pretty sure tomorrow morning when we are leaving and going along with the normal routine our neighbors (brand new neighbors) will be looking at us quite differently.
I swear I was not beating the child, although from the screams I am sure outsiders had visions of bamboo under being inserted under the child's fingernails.
A hand was never laid upon her, there were no threats of shipping her off to Abudabi, or even a mention of some sort of accidental "switch" at the hospital.
It was as simple as, "You need to get in bed, you're exhausted"
NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
It progressed from there. I'm pretty sure she is no longer allowed to have cake at her wedding, not sure how far ahead the punishments went.
We just went from the Huxtable's to the Simpson's in a matter of hours.
Not so fantastic, open window weather and your 5 year old throws a tantrum larger than the grand canyon! I am pretty sure tomorrow morning when we are leaving and going along with the normal routine our neighbors (brand new neighbors) will be looking at us quite differently.
I swear I was not beating the child, although from the screams I am sure outsiders had visions of bamboo under being inserted under the child's fingernails.
A hand was never laid upon her, there were no threats of shipping her off to Abudabi, or even a mention of some sort of accidental "switch" at the hospital.
It was as simple as, "You need to get in bed, you're exhausted"
NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
It progressed from there. I'm pretty sure she is no longer allowed to have cake at her wedding, not sure how far ahead the punishments went.
We just went from the Huxtable's to the Simpson's in a matter of hours.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Toothpaste in my eye
This folks is an honest to goodness, true story and explains the title of my blog perfectly.
Tonight I am prepping for bed and brushing my teeth (hygeine always comes first). Naturally, in moments like this, semi-silence, your mind starts to wander. My mind went to the fact that within the last 2 days I have spent 5 and a half hours commuting to work. I then starting thinking of new professions, what would be a great thing to do that makes everyone, including yourself, happy? Being an ice cream man (or woman) of course! I shall get me an ice cream truck. But ice cream trucks tend to annoy parents, they have to stop whatever they are doing, find money, make sure the kids aren't running out into the street. I need to please both children and parents alike with my mobile of happiness. So my ice cream truck will also have a fully stock bar on it. One creamsicle for the young, slightly out of control child, and a gin and tonic for the quickly aging extremely frazzled parent. It'll be perfection! But not everyone drinks, what could they use? Simple household amenities, toilet paper, milk, diapers...YES, YES, YES, no one likes having to run out and get them at the end of their long day. I shall also carry those on this fantastic invention!
It was then in all of my excitement that my toothbrush came flying out of my mouth and hit me in the left eye. Tooth paste burns you know. And so, I will have to drive my truck with a patch over my eye which will frighten the children. Rumors will spread as to what is behind that patch and no one will want to buy anything from me. People will be diving behind bushes, just so they don't make eye (singular) contact with me and I will be forced to go out of business.
This is how my mind works, all in a matter of minutes, a dream was developed and demolished.
Tonight I am prepping for bed and brushing my teeth (hygeine always comes first). Naturally, in moments like this, semi-silence, your mind starts to wander. My mind went to the fact that within the last 2 days I have spent 5 and a half hours commuting to work. I then starting thinking of new professions, what would be a great thing to do that makes everyone, including yourself, happy? Being an ice cream man (or woman) of course! I shall get me an ice cream truck. But ice cream trucks tend to annoy parents, they have to stop whatever they are doing, find money, make sure the kids aren't running out into the street. I need to please both children and parents alike with my mobile of happiness. So my ice cream truck will also have a fully stock bar on it. One creamsicle for the young, slightly out of control child, and a gin and tonic for the quickly aging extremely frazzled parent. It'll be perfection! But not everyone drinks, what could they use? Simple household amenities, toilet paper, milk, diapers...YES, YES, YES, no one likes having to run out and get them at the end of their long day. I shall also carry those on this fantastic invention!
It was then in all of my excitement that my toothbrush came flying out of my mouth and hit me in the left eye. Tooth paste burns you know. And so, I will have to drive my truck with a patch over my eye which will frighten the children. Rumors will spread as to what is behind that patch and no one will want to buy anything from me. People will be diving behind bushes, just so they don't make eye (singular) contact with me and I will be forced to go out of business.
This is how my mind works, all in a matter of minutes, a dream was developed and demolished.
Monday, September 13, 2010
What the...
I swear it was there a minute ago.
An entire post of the nonsense I did in college, how this blog got its title and now....nothing.
I am almost certain Hemingway did not have to deal with this unless a friend changed up the inkwell with invisible ink. Who said pen and paper is old fashion, it may be the way to go.
There would be no moments like I just had that's for sure! The only thing I would have to worry about is a strong wind or a spilled juice box, possibly a doodle or two, but not disappearing memoirs!
And so, this will have to wait until I am inspired again. My mojo went away with my post, gone with the wind and frankly my dear, I do give a damn!
An entire post of the nonsense I did in college, how this blog got its title and now....nothing.
I am almost certain Hemingway did not have to deal with this unless a friend changed up the inkwell with invisible ink. Who said pen and paper is old fashion, it may be the way to go.
There would be no moments like I just had that's for sure! The only thing I would have to worry about is a strong wind or a spilled juice box, possibly a doodle or two, but not disappearing memoirs!
And so, this will have to wait until I am inspired again. My mojo went away with my post, gone with the wind and frankly my dear, I do give a damn!
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